Category Archives: Parody

WORLDWIDE EXCLUSIVE: The Great Robbini’s predictions for Game #16 regular season finale | 2013-2014 Dallas Cowboys vs. Philadelphia Eagles

The GREAT Robbini looking into his Crystal Ball - The Boys Are Back blog 2013

Regular readers know that The Boys Are Back website features the ALMOST WORLD FAMOUS predictions from The GREAT Robbini. Our “exalted one” predicts the fate of America’s Team with unprecedented precision and accuracy from week-to-week.  Kinda!

Last week, eerily donning his old Jon Kitna jersey and a handful of Doan’s back pills, The GREAT Robbini correctly predicted a Dallas Cowboys win over the NFC East division cellar dwelling Washington Redskins. It was a close game … full of dramatic Cowboy mystic on the back (literally) of Tony Romo grit and determination. That rematch was a must-win game and ended with a Romo last minute do-or-die drive! It set up this NFL flexed Sunday Night primetime showdown with the Philadelphia Eagles. The Kelly green bunch from Philadelphia are full of confidence and strutting like the only cock in a packed hen house. Well, let’s just say … it’s yet to be determined just WHO will be circling WHO in this final battle! Dallas does have the philanthropic math teacher from Washington back on the roster, in case there is a true blue quarterbacking emergency! 

Tonight, The GREAT Robbini has eagerly stroked his balls and envisions a complete Viking-like transformation behind the leadership of Kyle Orton, the X-Factor Dez Bryant, and Marinelli’s Misfits anchored by world-class sackmaster DeMarcus Ware. Let it be known, the aging Robbini is drawing on decades (maybe centuries) of crystal ball and leather ball waxing and rubbing. Do NOT take his predictions lightly! As you can see from his glaring-eyed, younger than Monte Kiffin’ish reflection above, he’s drawing on some serous vibes (and possibly indigestion or constipation issues)!

The GREAT ONE was able to shoot me an email with some astonishing sights and stats. His glossy ball emitted images of a very determined Jason Garrett lead Dallas Cowboys team and supportive home crowd sportin’ some Christmas and New Year playoff magic. Jerry Jonesfive dollar Miller Lite’s will help.

Obviously, he’s psyched about the Dallas Cowboys vs. Philadelphia Eagles rematch with Chippy the Hippy… and ready to share his prognostications that we all count on from week-to-week. Without further delay, it’s time for The GREAT Robbini’s predictions …

The GREAT Robbini’s – 2013-2014 Dallas Cowboys game #16 predictions:

Cowboys Win

The 2013 Dallas Cowboys become the unlikely division winner. If that isn’t enough don’t forget that the Cowboys now have the distinction of twice sweeping the division. Something no other team in the NFC East has ever pulled off.

Do you wanna know how they do it? Its quite simple.

Without Tony Romo, the tattered Dallas defensive unit comes in ready to play. Knowing they now have to force stops, make tackles, and take away balls. In a measure of self-preservation, the NFL’s worst ranked D steps up to the challenge.

There’s more.

In the absence of Tony Romo this offensive line goes into beast mode. For the sake of Romo (and the season) and in a showing for Kyle Orton and D Murray, these guys play precision football. Dez and Co. dedicate an All-Star showing to their fallen general by lighting an offensive fire before the home crowd’s eyes. Jason Garrett’s Dallas Cowboys rise up on Sunday night and make a statement.

These guys play as a team. They have to. The only shame is having to wait until now. That it had to come to this. With plenty of excuses, this team very well could’ve ended it 12-4 and clinched a birth weeks ago. Missing personnel, bad planning, and premature celebrations. We’ve seen it all. Well, on Sunday Night Football you’ll see something else. Something you can be proud of.

Predictions for the Texas 2 Defense …

  • 2 takeaways
  • 3 sacks on Foles
  • Foles fumbles the ball
  • 2 sacks Hatcher
  • 1 sack Ware
  • fumble recovery Church
  • D gives up 310 in the air
  • D gives up 110 on the ground
  • Foles rushes for 20yds

WORLDWIDE EXCLUSIVE - The Great Robbini’s predictions for Game #16 regular season finale - 2013-2014 Dallas Cowboys vs. Philadelphia Eagles - Chip Kelly

Predictions for the offense …

  • Orton 300 yds.
  • Bryant Touchdown
  • Beasley Touchdown
  • Witten Touchdown
  • Murray Touchdown
  • Austin Touchdown
  • Murray/Randall 155 all purpose yards
  • Dez 150yards
  • Witten 50yards
  • Cowboys receive second half kick

The GREAT Robbini

Remember, you read it here! The Great Robbini predictions for game #16 regular season finale. Feel free to leave your final score or predictions in the comment section.


Stats and predictions to be confirmed by:

button - Dallas Cowboys Box Score - NFL Box score - 2013-2014 Dallas Cowboys

WORLDWIDE EXCLUSIVE: The Great Robbini’s predictions for Game #9 | 2013-2014 Dallas Cowboys vs. Minnesota Vikings

The GREAT Robbini's Crystal Ball - The Boys Are Back blog 2013

Regular readers know that The Boys Are Back website features the ALMOST WORLD FAMOUS predictions from The GREAT Robbini. Last week, our “exalted one” predicted a big win … and was almost correct!

This week, The GREAT Robbini expects a heavy dose of Marinelli Misfits setting the pace defensively and Tony Romo to repeatedly fire that cannon through the Vikings hull!

Recently, the GREAT ONE was distracted by a house full of little women hopped up on Halloween candy. Finally, the dust (and wrappers) has settled, and the GREAT Robbini is the only one left in the house wearing a costume. Tonight, he was able to sit down and put a seriously powerful rub on his magic ball. I’m told it was so vigorous, that his ball actually emitted purple.

Clearly, he’s psyched about the Dallas Cowboys – Minnesota Vikings vibe… and ready to share his prognostications that we all count on from week-to-week. Without further delay, it’s time for The GREAT Robbini’s predictions …

The GREAT Robbini’s – 2013-2014 Dallas Cowboys game #9 predictions:

Above .500 yet again

The Dallas Cowboys offense continue with the overall improved play of last week, as far as points on the board. The nagging issue was capitalizing on their chances given by the defense. This will improve somewhat against a hungry, but overwhelmed Vikings defense. Mark this one in the W column, and take it for what it is. Wins may not be so easy to come by in this months slate of games.

Predictions for the Texas 2 Defense …

  • 3 takeaways
  • 4 sacks
  • 1 sack Jason Hatcher
  • 1 sack Jarius Wynn
  • 2 sacks George Selvie
  • Sean Lee/Bruce Carter lead tackles
  • Jason Hatcher fumble recovery
  • Brandon Carr secures a takeaway
  • Dallas Cowboys injure Vikings player
  • Adrian Peterson out at least one drive

COWBOYS VS. VIKINGS GAMEDAY PRIMER: Minnesota RB Adrian Peterson still after Emmitt Smith’s NFL record

 

Predictions for the offense …

  • Tony Romo 330 yards, 4 TDs
  • Dez Bryant 100 yards, TD
  • Jason Witten 65 yards, TD
  • Terrance Williams 110 yards, TD
  • Cole Beasley 45 yards
  • DeMarco Murray TD
  • Rushing committee 110 yards
  • Cowboys receive second half kick

The GREAT Robbini

Remember, you read it here! The Great Robbini predictions for game #9. Leave your final score or predictions in the comment section.


Stats and predictions to be confirmed by:

button - Dallas Cowboys Box Score - NFL Box score - 2013-2014 Dallas Cowboys

EXCLUSIVE: The Great Robbini’s predictions for Game #8-2013 Dallas Cowboys vs. Detroit Lions

The GREAT Robbini's Crystal Ball - The Boys Are Back blog 2013

Regular readers already know that The Boys Are Back website features the ALMOST WORLD FAMOUS predictions from The GREAT Robbini. Last week, our “exalted one” predicted a big win … and was correct!

This week, The GREAT Robbini is on a heavy dose of Marinelli sauce and excitement this week! He even boosted his pregame commentary about this game. Last week, the GREAT ONE was distracted by a house full of women, clamoring for his mystical tunic, scarves, and head wrap. This weekend, he was able to escape their advances and sit down long enough to pound his thumbs on the keyboard for a little longer.

EXCLUSIVE - The Great Robbini’s predictions for Game #8-2013 Dallas Cowboys vs. Detroit Lions - Happy Halloween

After putting a world-class rub on his magic pumpkin, he was able to conger up visions of a Dallas Cowboys Hallowin.

Overwhelmingly psyched about the Dallas Cowboys – Detroit Lions incoming vibe… and ready to share his prognostications that we all count on from week-to-week. Without further delay, it’s time for The GREAT Robbini’s predictions. OK, here we go …

The GREAT Robbini’s – 2013-2014 Dallas Cowboys game #8 predictions:

Dallas Cowboys win. Players will be dinged up on both the Lions and Cowboys. A well played offensive game comes back for Dallas. Don’t turn away from this game before the clock stops ticking.

Predictions for the Texas 2 Defense …

  • 3 takeaways (2 INTs/2 FFs)
  • 4 team sacks
  • 1 1/2 sacks Hatcher (had 1, close enough)
  • 2 sacks Selvie
  • Lee/Carter lead tackles (Carr/Church)
  • Hatcher fumble recovery (Church/Heath had 1 each)
  • Carr interception (Lee had 2)
  • Claiborne secures a takeaway
  • Reggie Bush injured (shoulder stinger, came back in)

Predictions for the offense …

  • Romo 330 yards (206 yards, completed 14 of 30 passes)
  • Romo 4TDs (3 TDs)
  • Dez TD (Had 2 TDs today)
  • Witten TD
  • Randall TD
  • Williams TD (Dallas rookie record, 1 TD four consecutive games)
  • Rushing committee 90 yards (62 yards combined)
  • Dez 100 yards (3 catches for 72 yards)
  • Williams 110 yards (2 for 64 yards, plus 5 rushing (on the reverse)
  • Witten 65 yards (2 catches for 15 yards)
  • Beasley 45 yards (1 catch for 8 yards, last catch of the day)
  • Cowboys receive second half kick

The GREAT Robbini

Remember, you read it here! The Great Robbini predictions for game #8. Leave your final score or predictions in the comment section.


Stats and predictions confirmed by:

button - Dallas Cowboys Box Score - NFL Box score - 2013-2014 Dallas Cowboys

EXCLUSIVE: The Great Robbini’s predictions for Game #7-2013 Dallas Cowboys vs. Philadelphia Eagles

The GREAT Robbini's Crystal Ball - The Boys Are Back blog 2013

Regular readers already know that The Boys Are Back blog features the ALMOST WORLD FAMOUS predictions from The GREAT Robbini. Last week, our “exalted one” predicted a big win … and was correct!

This week, The GREAT Robbini can barely contain his excitement, as you’ll see from his exhaustive pregame commentary about the game. I get the distinct impression that either the GREAT One was distracted by a house full of women this weekend, or he left his magic ball out in the trunk of his car again! It’s ok, that happens from time to time.

Quietly, he is psyched about the Dallas Cowboys – Philadelphia Eagles incoming (mostly numeric) vibe… and ready to share his prognostications that we all count on from week-to-week. Without further delay, it’s time for The GREAT Robbini’s predictions. OK, here we go …

 

The GREAT Robbini’s – 2013-2014 Dallas Cowboys game #7 predictions:

Cowboys win (<—Pardon Robbini, while he rambles on and on)

Predictions for the Texas 2 Defense …

  • 2 takeaways (3 INTs on Barkley)
  • 4 sacks (close, was 3 total)
  • 2 sacks Hatcher (1 for Hatcher this week)
  • Lee/Carter lead tackles (Lee, Church, Carr)
  • Hatcher fumble recovery
  • Carr interception

Predictions for the offense …

  • Romo 330 yards (317, close enough)
  • Romo 4TDs (1 TD to Williams)
  • Dez TD (Williams had the lone WR TD)
  • Austin TD (Williams had the lone WR TD)
  • Randall TD (Ouch, Tanner spiked the rock)
  • Rushing committee 55 yards (75 combined)
  • Dez 80 yards (8 for 110 yards)
  • Williams 110 yards (6 for 71 yards)
  • Witten 80 yards (4 for 48)
  • Eagles receive second half kick

The GREAT Robbini

Remember, you read it here! The Great Robbini predictions for game #7. Leave your final score or predictions in the comment section.


Stats confirmed by:

button - Dallas Cowboys Box Score - NFL Box score - 2013-2014 Dallas Cowboys

SIMPLIFIED STATS FOR PHILLY FANS: Pictures (and fun facts) for our rival Philadelphia Eagles followers

We wanted to post something easy to understand for the Philadelphia Eagles fans that visit this website. You know the old adage … “a picture is worth a 1000 words”. So, here we go … 

Infographic- Dallas Cowboys matchup with Philadelphia Eagles - Series Notes

Eagles fans, please focus your attention to the photo above, and note … historically, the Dallas Cowboys OWN YOU!

Infographic- Dallas Cowboys matchup with Philadelphia Eagles - League Rankins

Now, this next one is tricky! Pay attention. Philly averages more yards … but, Dallas scores more points. This will be KEY to the OUTCOME of the game!!! Also note, your team (Philly) allows more yards and more points defensively that the Dallas Cowboys! Again, this is BIG! On a positive note, due to the Cowboys domination of ‘time of possession’, your team will have more time on the sidelines to enjoy cheesesteak, hoagies, soft pretzels, and whatever the hell a Tastykake is!

Infographic- Dallas Cowboys matchup with Philadelphia Eagles - Team Leaders - QBs

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Infographic- Dallas Cowboys matchup with Philadelphia Eagles - Team Leaders - RBs and WRs

Ok, welcome back from your nap. I know this has been hard on you! Please stay focused. There are a LOT of numbers above, so lets run through this as quickly as possible. Tony Romo is better than both of your quarterbacks combined! Your running backs have great numbers, because other teams have allowed them to run. Expect this to change on Sunday (that’s tomorrow, after you wake up from your BIG NAP). Your team does an OK job of receiving the ball and making plays. If you had a defense to stop Dallas’ receivers you’d have a shot. Won’t happen. Try to prepare yourself, mentally.

Infographic- Dallas Cowboys matchup with Philadelphia Eagles - Tony Romo 100th start

Now, let’s wrap this up. Tony Romo will have his 100th start against your team on Sunday afternoon. Please note, there are NO Philly quarterbacks on these stats (above). Also note, there are no other NFC East quarterbacks on this picture above. I know what you’re thinking … It’s hard to soar like an Eagle when you’re playing with a bunch of turkeys! By the way, it will be 73 and sunny in Big D tomorrow. Enjoy the game (pregame warm-ups).

EXCLUSIVE: The Great Robbini’s predictions for Game #6-2013 Dallas Cowboys vs. Washington Redskins

Regular readers already know that The Boys Are Back blog features the ALMOST WORLD FAMOUS predictions from The GREAT Robbini. Last week, our “exalted one” wasn’t able to enlighten us. He kept getting mixed signals on the winner … along with what seemed to be out of this world stat vibes from both teams! He thought his ball was shorting out, so he remained silent and gave his ball a week to cool off.

This week, The GREAT Robbini is psyched about the Cowboys – Redskins incoming vibe… and ready to share his prognostications that we all count on from week-to-week. Without further delay, it’s time for The GREAT Robbini’s predictions. OK, here we go …

The GREAT Robbini’s – 2013-2014 Dallas Cowboys game #6 predictions:

Kiffins’ Beast from the East awakens…

…the Texas 2 Defense. With an abysmal showing against Denver the Dallas Cowboys defense finally snaps back. What seemed to be the more dominant defense in a dubious NFC East will get back on track against the Redskins. DeMarcus Ware, General Lee, and the ‘boys take a stand against porous Washington. Cowboys shut ‘em down like food stamps.

Predictions for the Texas 2 Defense …

  • 3 takeaways
  • 4 sacks
  • 2 sacks Ware
  • Lee/Carter lead tackles
  • Griffin out at least one drive
  • Hatcher fumble recovery
  • Carr interception

Predictions for the offense …

  • Romo 300 yards
  • Romo 3 TDs
  • Dez TD
  • Austin TD
  • Murray TD
  • Rushing committee 140 yards
  • Dez 100 yard game
  • Williams 60 yards
  • Witten 60 yards
  • Cowboys receive second half kick

The GREAT Robbini

Remember, you read it here! The Great Robbini predictions for game #6. Leave your final score or predictions in the comment section.

THE GREAT BLOTCH WATCH: The truth behind Peyton Manning’s goofy red forehead spots

By now, everyone is familiar with the red blotch that appears on Peyton Manning’s forehead after he removes his helmet. Obviously, these blotches appear because of the padding inside Manning’s helmet. Or does it?

Peyton Manning isn't happy with his two picks - Dallas Cowboys vs

Just for fun … let’s get some wagering into precisely what time we’ll see this mysterious red forehead blotch appear during the Dallas Cowboys vs. Denver Broncos broadcast on Sunday. I’m thinking … early in the second quarter.

THE GREAT BLOTCH WATCH - All eyes on Peyton Manning’s red forehead - The Boys Are Back blog 2013

I have a theory … along with several questions. Is it possible that Peyton Manning’s brain actually grows during the course of a game? Does his helmet have a pump for inflatable pads? Does it glow in the dark? Does it get redder as Eli gets more overshadowed? Is he able to communicate with aliens? Does he emit radiation for opposing players? Does he have a twin that’s trying to escape from within?

I digress. Back to my theory. Bare with me. I think this relates to the Big Bang, somehow. Sure scientist have their version, but let’s consider this. I believe that there is a unique combination of molecular activity (accelerated by beer/hotdog expulsion gasses) that occur during every football game. All we need is a trigger! Some kind of spark. Some kind of conduit. Anything could set it off! Let’s say some foreign imbalance of gases enter the AT&T Stadium atmosphere. For example, Jerry Jones dressing up as a concessions vendor … selling a $7 hot dog in the stands, could trigger something! JJ does love money! We know this! It could emit some kind of super-human testosterone gas when he jubilantly sticks the tax-free cash in his pocket! Atoms smashing … neutrons and electrons flowing like a mofo! Then, you add this renegade molecule into the Jerry’s sealed off dome! Holy shit!!!

THE GREAT BLOTCH WATCH - All eyes should be on Peyton Manning’s red forehead - The Boys Are Back blog 2013

I sense some apprehension from you, the reader. Let me back myself up with some facts (or reasonable facsimiles). Governments have spent billions on super-conducting super-colliders. Clearly, there is something to this atom smashing thing! All the while, Peyton Manning’s brain cells have been on a superhuman evolution course all by themselves. Evidence has been present since his final days in Indianapolis. Since then, the blotch is getting bigger! It’s getting redder! It’s probably getting hotter! Did the Colts organization suspect and cover-up any of this? Note the devilish facial expression! Pure evil! The Colts moved on, mysteriously, and ended up with the franchise savior … Andrew Luck.

Funny - THE GREAT BLOTCH WATCH - The real story behind Peyton Manning’s goofy red forehead spots

Then, there’s this. The year he disappeared! What’s up with that? Was he transported somewhere? Did he have intrusive or exploratory brain surgery? Was ‘something’ injected into his super brain? After all, he can read defenses! This is a superpower that no other NFL quarterback posses! We’d hear about it if other quarterbacks had this mysterious power!

Was he probed? If so, did he like it? Did they also capture Eli? Was his little brain gene injecting into Peyton skull? Think about it. Eli has struggled this year! Doesn’t seem quite like himself. Hmmmm.

Moving on. If my theory is right, stuff will happen “Under the Dome” on Sunday afternoon! AT&T has connections! AT&T is powerful too! Jerry Jones knows this! He accepted millions of dollars recently for the stadium naming rights! Jerry resisted other suitors for years! Called it Cowboys Stadium to throw us all off his grand scheme. Then, suddenly … in the same exact year that Peyton Manning’s superhuman, super-colliding, super-conducting brain was scheduled … pooff, we have a deal! Coincidence? I think not!

Now, for the meat of this article. I believe AT&T has sponsored Peyton Manning’s forehead. That’s right! You read it here first!

THE GREAT BLOTCH WATCH - All eyes on Peyton Manning’s red forehead - AT&T sponsored Manning forehead - The Boys Are Back blog 2013

Manning is notorious for his commercial ventures! This is a fact that you cannot deny! I truly expect the AT&T logo to emerge from Peyton’s forehead. I don’t know if it’ll be neon, just saying … it’s happening! If you’ll just for once, rethink possible! Just look at the red splotch. It fits perfectly!

It could get worse. If the gases and molecules collide in some unthinkable combination, like never before … Peyton’s super-colliding super-conduction superhuman brain could merge with the telephone giant! Don’t be surprised if you see lightning come from Jerry’s huge stadium monitor and start the whole damn thing! There will be a BIG BANG! The stage is set. The world is watching. All of Peyton Manning’s thoughts (or his aliens leaders) will then be broadcasted on that big ass monitor! Inside, thousands upon thousands, of Dallas Cowboys fans fall victim. FOX’s conspiracy theorists will be in heaven! Your smartphone will actually get smarter! Jerry Jones will sell Peyton Manning super-colliding, super-conducting, superhuman brain t-shirts. (They’re probably already printed).

THE GREAT BLOTCH WATCH - The real story behind Peyton Manning’s goofy red forehead spots - Your AT&T smartphone could get smarter

Dallas, with all of it’s might, have only one chance to foil this plan. The Dallas Cowboys must defeat the Denver Broncos! They can stop this madness! DeMarcus Ware must sack the superhuman and ground his super-colliding, super-conducting, superhuman brain to the brand new negative charging super-turf at AT&T stadium. Dez, on his way to the end zone, can throw a cup of Tom Brady’s neutron spiked Powerade on Peyton Manning’s forehead. Jay Ratliff could turn off the electricity to that big ass monitor! He’s not doing anything else, right? Denver has not played in a dome this season. Let’s hope someone opens the rooftop this Sunday! Just in case. This could neutralize the whole damn thing! A parody, of course.

THE GREAT BLOTCH WATCH - The real story behind Peyton Manning’s goofy red forehead spots - Open the dome, please

Your comments (and theories) are welcome.


Peyton Manning head is still growing

Updated 01-10-2014

The NFL’s Divisional Round in the playoffs start in a few days. As you are all aware, the ‘Polar Vortex’ that put a significant freeze on the United States this week has finally subsided. It left Niagara Falls partially frozen and wrecked havoc on the Wild Card weekend home teams. Only the domed Indianapolis Colts survived the first wave of playoff home contenders. This once-in-twenty-year weather phenomenon may NOT be a coincidence. I suspect that Peyton Manning’s superhuman, super-colliding, super-conducting brain was able to bring about this ‘timely’ weather event. Take note that Andrew Luck was one of the surviving playoff quarterbacks. He was protected by the Dome (and probably his far from groomed facial hair). Sets up an AFC showdown … pitting the hairy savior Andrew Luck against Peyton Manning arch nemesis … Tom Brady. The drama continues …

This photo of Peyton Manning surfaced today. Yes, his forehead is larger. Notice the emerging horns protruding upwards from his eyebrows … the snarl … and his piercing evil eyes. Peyton Manning mile-high forehead is gaining ground and super powers. His neck also appears to be getting longer. I’m not sure of the significance of that. Just an observation. Stay tuned.  

EXCLUSIVE: The Great Robbini’s predictions for Week #4-2013 Dallas Cowboys @ San Diego Chargers

Regular readers already know that The Boys Are Back blog features the ALMOST WORLD FAMOUS predictions from The GREAT Robbini. Last week, our “exalted one” was pretty much dead-on with his predictions.

Last weeks win over the ‘other’ Missouri team gives us die-hard Cowboys fans (and Demarco Murray) reason to celebrate. We’ve seen the sudden emergence of a running game and a havoc causing Texas-2 defense coming into their own identity. Today’s game in San Diego should feel like a Dallas Cowboys home game with the heavy fan base in sunny Southern California. Bruised Romo should be in better shape this week. While Miles Austin sits on the bench with his hamstring, Jason Garrett will ask next-men-up Terrence Williams, Dwayne Harris, and Cole Beasley to take up the slack. In the trenches, right guard Brian Waters is expected to start … and Mackenzy Bernadeau will be suited up as backup for both guard positions. The Dallas front-four will be without Anthony Spencer for the remainder of the 2013-2014 NFL season … but, Marinelli’s hungry linemen have shown they are up to the task through the first three games.

The GREAT Robbini is psyched about the Cowboys – Chargers incoming vibe… and ready to share his prognostications that we all count on from week-to-week. Without further delay, it’s time for The GREAT Robbini’s predictions. OK, here we go …

The GREAT Robbini’s – 2013-2014 Dallas Cowboys week #4 predictions:

Cowboys set up shop in San Diego, Qualcomm stadium looks like ‘home away from home’

The Dallas Cowboys, on a mission to fuel up their game before hosting “unstoppable” Denver, get behind the wheel in Norv’s old town. They’ll head back to Big D, with plenty in the tank and a ‘W’ in the trunk. Expect a high octane performances from Dez, Demarco, TE group and Kiffin’s boys.

Predictions for the Texas 2 Defense …

  • 3 takeaways
  • DeMarcus Ware 3 sacks
  • J.J. Wilcox 1 sack
  • Brandon Carr INT
  • Jason Hatcher 2 sacks
  • 6 team sacks
  • Carter/Wilcox lead tackles
  • 1 San Diego Charger injured

Predictions for the offense …

  • Tony Romo 300 yards, 4 TDs
  • Dez Bryant 75 yards, 2 TDs
  • Williams 50 yards
  • Beasley 30 yards
  • Jason Witten 65 yards, TD
  • Gavin Escobar 30 yards, TD
  • James Hanna 15 yards
  • Demarco Murray TD
  • Rushing committee 150 yards
  • Offensive line 3 penalties
  • Cowboys receive opening kick
  • Offense starts game with possession
  • Cowboys control time of possession

The GREAT Robbini

Remember, you read it here! The Great Robbini predictions for week #4. Leave your final score or predictions in the comment section.

EXCLUSIVE: The Great Robbini’s predictions for Week #2-2013 Dallas Cowboys @ Kansas City Chiefs

Regular readers already know that The Boys Are Back blog features the ALMOST WORLD FAMOUS predictions from The GREAT Robbini. Last week, our “exalted one” was pretty much dead-on with his predictions . We’re not sure if he spent extra time waxing his ball in the offseason, or exactly what happened! Quite impressive! Those results will be available by clicking HERE in the very near future.  

Dallas Cowboys crystal ball - Dallas Cowboys win prediction - The Boys Are Back blog - The GREAT Robbini

Last weeks win over the evil arch rival New York Giants gives us die-hard Cowboys fans reason to celebrate. We’ve seen the sudden emergence of a takeaway happy defense, TE Jason Witten twice reacquainted with the end-zone, and offensive line that doesn’t make us quiver with every snap. Today, uppermost in our minds is the 450 yards the Texas 2 defense yielded to the New York Giants offense … and three banged up cowpokes from last Sunday. Bruised Romo, Dez, and Mo are expected to take the field against Andy Reid’s Chiefs … and put on a show for that sea of red at Arrowhead Stadium. When the fat lady sings, one of these teams will be kicking off the 2013-2014 NFL season at 2-0.

The GREAT Robbini is psyched about the Cowboys – Chiefs incoming vibe… and ready to share his prognostications that we all count on from week-to-week. Without further delay, it’s time for The GREAT Robbini’s predictions. OK, here we go …

    The GREAT Robbini’s – 2013-2014 Dallas Cowboys week #2 predictions:

    ‘Boys take names at Arrowhead

    Dallas Cowboys mount up and head to K.C. with a wagonload of momentum. The ‘boys take out the big chief in a tough battle. When the smoke clears, they ride out with the W.

    Predictions for the Texas 2 Defense …

    • 3 takeaways
      DeMarcus Ware 2 sacks
      Sean Lee INT
      Jason Hatcher 1 sack
      Church/Carter lead tackles
      Alex Smith sacked 4x
      Texas 2 Defense gives up 23 points
      Texas 2 Defense shuts out Chiefs in one quarter

      • Predictions for the offense …

        • Tony Romo 330 yards
          Tony Romo 3 TDs
          Dez Bryant TD
          Miles Austin TD
          DeMarco Murray TD
          Lance Dunbar TD
          Gavin Escobar 30 yards
          Dez Bryant 70 yards
          Jason Witten 35 yards
          Williams 45 yards
          Miles Austin 70 yards
          DeMarco Murray fumble
          Rushing committee 110 yards
          Tony Romo sacked 3 times
          Offense starts game with possession

        The GREAT Robbini

        Remember, you read it here! The Great Robbini predictions for week #2. Leave your final score or predictions in the comment section.

        EXCLUSIVE: The Great Robbini’s predictions for Week #1–New York Giants @ 2013 Dallas Cowboys

        Regular readers already know that The Boys Are Back blog features the ALMOST WORLD FAMOUS predictions from The GREAT Robbini. Last season, the predictor disappeared for several weeks. While the exact age of The Great Robbini is unknown, it’s widely believed that he was experiencing some kind of midlife crisis.

        Dallas Cowboys crystal ball - Dallas Cowboys win prediction - The Boys Are Back blog - The GREAT Robbini

        It has been a very productive offseason. As promised, it became ‘uncomfortable’ for last years Dallas Cowboys. Jason Garrett delegated offensive play-calling duties to Callahan, new defensive coaches and scheme (the Texas 2 defense), more gameday planning from quarterback Tony Romo, and Cowboys Stadium has been renamed. Jerry Jones is younger, Stephen Jones has secret sauce, and Jay Ratliff isn’t playing (ooooh, that’s the same). The Great Robbini is geeked! He has tuned his crystal ball directly to the AT&T network! We expect that his apparatus is beaming signals loud and clear!

        The GREAT Robbini is psyched about the 2013-2014 Dallas Cowboys incoming vibe… and ready to share his prognostications that we all count on from week-to-week. Without further delay, it’s time for The GREAT Robbini’s predictions. I’m sure you’ll agree … a lot of these will come true. OK, here we go …

        The GREAT Robbini’s – 2013-2014 Dallas Cowboys week #1 predictions:

        Cowboys roll over the Giants! Dallas Cowboys start it off right in newly named AT&T Stadium.

        It seems that “in the Garrett era” that consistently, the top division rival has been the uhhhh …New Jersey Giants. Mostly for the way they’ve taken a W out of the past four Cowboys Stadium contests. Usually a close game leaving bitterness in the mouths of us all. This time around the ‘Boys take Eli & Co. out in an execution style massacre in Arlington.

        Predictions for the Texas 2 Defense …

        • 4 sacks on Eli Manning
          4 takeaways
          Sean Lee forced fumble
          JJ Wilcox INT
          DeMarcus Ware 2 sacks
          Victor Cruz Injured
          Bruce Carter/Barry Church lead tackles

        Predictions for the offense …

        • Tony Romo 3 TDs
          Dez Bryant 2 TDs
          Gavin Escobar TD
          DeMarco Murray TD
          RB committee 130 yds. +
          Dan Bailey 2 FGs
          Miles Austin 60 yds.
          Dez Bryant 100 yds.
          Cole Beasley 30 yds.
          Terrence Williams 30 yds.
          Jason Witten 45 yds.
          Gavin Escobar 25 yds.
          Tony Romo sacked twice
          1 giveaway

        The GREAT Robbini

        Remember, you read it here! The Great Robbini predictions for week #1. Leave your final score or predictions in the comment section.

        WTF–CALLING ON AMERICA’S TRUE BLUES: Your Dallas Cowboys team is currently ranked #2

        Currently, your Dallas Cowboys are ranked #2 on the NFL FAN REWARDS program! Check out the embarrassing rankings below …

        What is wrong with this picture - Dallas Cowboys ranked number two

        The New England Patriots ranked #1 (in points earned, fan participation)??? Seriously??? That should bother any self-respecting Dallas Cowboys fan!!!

        Nothing wrong with this picture - Dallas Cowboys ranked number one in fans

        Sure, the Dallas Cowboys are ranked #1 in registered fans. There are 308,903 Dallas Cowboys fans registered for NFL FAN REWARDS. That’s something to be proud of … but, there is a problem …

        What is wrong with this picture - Dallas Cowboys ranked 31 in average points

        The Dallas Cowboy FANS aren’t racking up enough points! Look at that! Registered fans that signed up and forgot who they’re representing in the world of NFL fandom … America’s Team … God’s Team! Aren’t you embarrassed? We’re down in the basement with the likes of the Cleveland Browns for God’s sake! Lions! Chiefs! Bears! and lowly Cincinnati Bengals!

        NFL FAN REWARDS - What right about America - robertdknight in top five - The Boys Are Back blog 2013

        I know for a fact that some True Blue fans are racking up the points (like your fearless editor on this blog – robertdknight) … participating regularly (like myself, even loosing valuable sleep on occasion)… racing home before the midnight daily deadline … pumping up those point totals like real men! Then, we have the slackers! Shame on YOU!

        NFL FAN REWARDS - you could win valuable prizes like this priceless keychain - The Boys Are Back blog 2013

        Not to rub it in … but you could OWN one of these valuable prizes with your NFL FAN REWARDS coins! Boast about the significant discounts (5-20%) on the NFL photo store or the NFL shop. That pencil eraser could be YOURS! Think about it … you could save 10% on that new Miami Dolphins Ray Finkle jersey for your father in law!  Who doesn’t need NFL logo’ed socks for the wintertime? And the picture over the fireplace … ditch it! Snatch up custom framed photograph of Bernie Kosar (sportin that star on his helmet) from the NFL photo store! You need this stuff! Your spouse will totally understand and appreciate your dedicated effort. The mowing and edging can wait! Rain washes cars!

        NFL Fan Rewards program - The Boys Are Back blog

        Don’t worry. As you’ve come to expect, I have the solution! Drop everything, put the kids in bed, seal yourself off from the rest of the world … and dedicate your life to this worthy cause! I promise that your testosterone levels will increase 50% and your penis will grow 30% by the time you reach Hall of Fame status (which I will reach this month)! You trust me, right?

        Click HERE to register for the NFL FAN REWARDS program. Make me proud!!! Walk with that Jimmy Johnson swagger!

        EXCLUSIVE: BREAKING NEWS – The Great Robbini captured in Mexico

        Regular readers already know that The Boys Are Back blog features the ALMOST WORLD FAMOUS predictions from The GREAT Robbini. In week #2, he claimed that the humidity in Seattle fogged up his crystal ball. We let that one slide. Everyone expected the sunny skies in Dallas home game would help beam in some clear images! Well, it did! The GREAT Robbini was seen celebrating Dallas’ week #3 win late into the early morning hours! Looked like The GREAT Robbini was on track … until reports started trickling in about spotting him at numerous Dallas area nightclubs prior to the Cowboys-Bears week #4 game!

        After continuous phone calls, tweets, and messages left with Dallas stripers, we finally gave up on contacting The GREAT Robbini for his week #4 picks! After the Dallas loss, we feared the worst (he had eloped to Vegas with one of the girls).

        The Dallas bye week only added to the drama. He was spotted in Baltimore wearing an old Bernie Kosar jersey from back in the day! Apparently upset with the Cleveland Browns move up to Maryland (you’d thing this emotion would have passed by now) … and holding on to the glory days of Cleveland’s Kosar (in Dallas). Sad turn of events! Undoubtedly, upset with the Ravens win, he wasn’t seen for several weeks.

        Remarkably, The GREAT Robbini was seen on the CBS broadcast of the Cleveland at Dallas game in week #11. Unshaven, tattered Kosar jersey … and furiously stroking his ball (crystal) during the game winning field goal by Bailey! We sent security down to the field, but he had already left.

        Then, three more weeks. Nothing. Not a word.  Finally, FOX’s sideline reporter spotted him (with a tall, unidentified woman) coming out of the visiting teams locker room at the Cincinnati game. Clutching dozens of various Dallas Cowboy jerseys, a helmet, and an iPod Touch … they vanished. At this point, we were seriously concerned.

        The Great Robbini - Playa Del Carmen Mexico - The Boys Are Back blog

        No news for a week. Only reports that Dallas Cowboys jerseys started showing up on eBay from a seller identified as thelovepirate located in Playa Del Carmen, Mexico. We sent a crew down to Playa and hired a private investigator. With their help, we were able to obtain a few photographs to help resolve this bizarre behavior.

        The Great Robbini - Playa del Carmen beach in Mexico - The Boys Are Back blog

        Beachcombers reported a mysterious pirate-type of flag that appeared in random spots in the early morning hours. These spots were littered with empty Tequila bottles, fish bones, a spent campfire, and indiscernible poems written on the back of PayPal receipts. We notified the Policia. 

        Policia Turistica - Mexico - The Great Robbini - The Boys Are Back blog

        The Policia Turistica setup a sting operation with the cooperation of our highly recommended private investigator. Nothing. The Great Robbini (aka The Love Pirate) disappeared. Determined, we went down to Mexico to meet with our private investigator, Pablo Magnum de Remington Steele.

        Upon arrival, we noticed a familiar Dallas Cowboys helmet on his credenza. It had been allegedly autographed with shaky signatures of Tony Romo and Bernie Kosar. When questioned, Pablo became defensive. It appeared we had a leak in the Robbini/Love Pirate love-nest sting operation. Our hopes diminished, disheartened by the corruption and elusive behavior of our prognostication guru … we headed back to Dallas.

        Policia Municipal - Mexico - The Great Robbini - The Boys Are Back blog

        Then, when it seemed hopeless … a break! Multiple domestic violence calls started pouring into the Policia Municipal office in Playa Del Carmen, Mexico. The disturbance at a backroom bungalow inside a local tavern, drew large crowds of spectators. “No mas de pirate” chants erupted as the hostile crowd discovered that The Great Robbini’s new bride was actually the twin brother of famed Baby Dolls dancer Harriett Mound. Turned out, after a three day binge, when both of the newlyweds awoke, Harry had accumulated a lot of facial hair. Apparently, this caused The GREAT Robbini to flip out! Under considerable mental duress, Mr. Robbini was taken into custody, but allowed the courtesy of visiting the Valladolid Church to repent.

        Valladolid Church - The Great Robbini - The Boys Are Back blog

        The GREAT Robbini is being held on multiple charges in Mexico. We have been able to communicate via his iPod Touch and the wifi connection at the Policia Station. He is expected to be expedited to Dallas in the coming days for local charges.  Harry Mound has offered to post bond, but Mr. Robbini has declined the gesture. Understandably distraught and confused, The GREAT Robbini has released the following message:

        “To loyal readers and fans of The Boys Are Back blog,I apologize for not providing the much anticipated predictions for the past 12 weeks. While I can’t recall every event, I experienced an adventure that most of you would relish. The wedding in Vegas was awesome. However, I strongly recommend no intoxicating beverages before you actually agree to the nuptials. I thought my bride just had big hands. Seemed reasonable that the gruff voice was from the delicious drinks at the casinos. I was in a trance for weeks! I thought it was the magic of my crystal ball. Turns out it was more about the relentless romantic whirlwind from being in love … and untold gallons of liquor. My bad. I have no money to get out of jail. Only this unsold Poppinga jersey, sweat pants, sandals, iPod Touch, a fish hook, and the love of an ugly cross-dressing brother of my dream girl. I rubbed my ball (crystal) … and it DON’T look good for me!!!

        As the editor of The Boys Are Back blog … I’d like to apologize also. There were signs of instability, but I wanted to bring you this wonderful feature. I had no idea that The GREAT Robbini had gambling issues, bad taste in women, or a tendency to fish with the worm inside each tequila bottle. His hero, Bernie Kosar, would be very disappointed.

        I’m sure you all understand. The GREAT Robbini has a lot of things to work out. The Dallas Cowboys season is winding down. We hope for a win tonight vs. the Washington Redskins. We decided to ‘go ahead’ and publish The GREAT Robbini’s predictions for this last week. Not sure if he’ll be back in 2013-2014. We’ll negotiate that in the offseason. Without further delay, it’s time for The GREAT Robbini’s predictions. I’m sure you’ll agree … a lot of these will come true. OK, here we go …

        Dallas rolls over RG3–wins division, playoff spot.

        Ware 1 sack.

        Spencer 1 sack.

        Lissemore 1 sack.

        Boys D forces 2 turnovers.

        Boys hold skins to a FG on 2 drives.

        WAS punts 4x.

        Romo 350yds.

        Romo 3 TDs.

        Witten TD.

        Dez TD.

        Murray TD.

        Romo rushing TD.

        Witten reaches 1000 yds on season.

        Murray 65 yds.

        Dallas receives ball to start 2nd half.

        Romo 1 INT.

        Game ends in regulation.

        Poppinga is MVP, and I’m able to sell this jersey for thousands!

        Bernie Kosar forgives me

        I get my marriage annulled

        I am able to block recent images and memories of my honeymoon

        Tequila is banned in North America

        The Boys Are Back readers will ask for my contract renewal.

        Vegas will require sobriety tests before each wedding

         

        — The GREAT Robbini 

        Happy New Year Dallas Cowboy fans!

        RUNNING THROUGH THE GLORYHOLE: Jason Garrett, “We’ll get this running game going.”

        Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo (9) hands the ball of to Dallas Cowboys running back DeMarco Murray - The Boys Are Back blog

        IRVING, Texas – The running game is trending the wrong way.

        After rushing for 131 yards in the opener, running back DeMarco Murray’s yards on the ground have consistently decreased every week since, culminating in 24 yards rushing against the Bears.

        But head coach Jason Garrett won’t stop feeding Murray the ball anytime soon.

        “His patience, his persistence, his toughness have all been good,” Garrett said. “He just needs to understand we’re going to keep trying to give him opportunities. He needs to keep doing what he’s supposed to do and trust the other guys that they’re going to do what they’re supposed to do, and we’ll get this running game going.”

        The average per rush for Murray isn’t as much of a problem as the constant negative rushes and the Cowboys falling behind early, forcing them to throw.

        Murray is currently rushing for 3.9 yards per carry. That number is only over 3.0 yards per carry because of his 6.6 yards per carry performance in the opener. Of the 18 running backs with 60 or more carries this season, Murray is one of seven rushing for fewer than 4.0 yards per carry.

        After a superb rushing performance on 20 carries against the Giants, his average fell to 3.7 yards per rush against the Seahawks, 2.1 against Tampa Bay and 2.2 against the Bears. He finished 39th in rushing last week with his 24 yards at home, as he was met in the backfield on most of his 11 rushes.

        He was stopped at the line of scrimmage or met in the backfield on five of his 11 rushes. Murray never got a rushing opportunity in the fourth quarter.

        “Teams have done a good job trying to move around up front,” Garrett said. “Sometimes the run isn’t always as clean as you want it to be. He’s been a running back for a long, long time, and he understands that.”

        Until the offensive line can start creating (GLORY) holes for the running back, containing the frustration might be difficult.

        Garrett said the lack of a running game can’t be placed on Murray’s shoulders. Even in his stellar performance against the Giants, Murray’s 48-yard run came as a result of a busted play where he had to make something out of nothing, cutting inside on a toss play to the right before bursting back outside along the sideline.

        “I think he does a really good job,” Garrett said. “He’s done a good job just being persistent throughout the ballgame and trying to continue to be true to the runs and trying to find the (glory) hole that’s there.”

        Courtesy:  Rowan Kavner (Edited/butchered/humorized by Robert D Knight)

        EXCLUSIVE: The Great Robbini’s BOLD predictions for Week #2

        Regular readers already know that The Boys Are Back blog features the ALMOST WORLD FAMOUS predictions from The GREAT Robbini. He’s psyched about the 2012 Dallas Cowboys vibe … and ready to share his prognostications that we all count on from week-to-week.

        Without further delay, it’s time for The GREAT Robbini’s predictions. I’m sure you’ll agree … a lot of these will come true. OK, here we go …

        The GREAT Robbini – Week #2 predictions:

        Cowboys take Seahawks seriously – dominate game!

        The Dallas Cowboys defense continues growth, leaves rookie QB shaken.

        • 5 team sacks, including:
        • 1 sack for Sean Lee
        • 2 sacks for DeMarcus Ware
        • Sean Lee leads tackles
        • 1+ takeaways per half
        • 1 Brandon Carr interception
        • 1 Seattle Seahawk injured
        • Cowboys allow 13+ points
        • Seattle limited to 90 yards rushing

        The Dallas offense continues where it left off against the New York Giants. :

        • Cowboys receive opening kick
        • Cowboys score on first drive
        • 3 Tony Romo TD’s, 300 yards passing
        • 2 Dez Bryant TD’s
        • 1 Witten TD
        • 1 DeMarco Murray TD
        • Team rushes for 145+ yards
        • Cowboys lead at half-time
        • 70 yards penalties
        • Cowboys win by 7 or more

        The GREAT Robbini

        INSIDE THE NUMBERS: Dallas Cowboys success with 10 days of rest, preparation

        GAMEDAY - Dallas Cowboys vs Seattle Seahawks - The Boys Are Back blog

        Riding the high of a monumental win over the defending Super Bowl champs in their own home, the Dallas Cowboys must now prepare for a road tilt with the Seattle Seahawks. By all accounts, this is a “trap” game for Dallas. The ’Boys will be on the road for the second straight week, visiting a Seahawks team that went down against a lackluster Arizona Cardinals squad.

        On paper, the Cowboys will be the favorites. In reality, they’re entering a hostile environment – CenturyLink Field is known for being one of the loudest stadiums in the NFL – to face a motivated ball club. The game won’t be a piece of cake for Dallas, and Jason Garrett will make sure his players understand that.

        One of the things the Cowboys have on their side is time. After playing in a rare Wednesday night contest, Dallas will have 10 days off to prepare for the Seahawks. In addition to allowing some bodies to heal, the extra rest provides the coaches with a whole lot of time to break down Seattle – their offensive tendencies, their blitzes, and their young, mobile rookie quarterback. 96 extra hours, to be exact.

        I’m a big believer in the value of game preparation. Ever watch a college bowl game and notice how prepared the teams look to face one another? Gadget plays, exotic blitzes, perfectly-timed calls. Some of these teams have a month to get themselves ready for their bowl game – a month in which they can uncover just about every possible opponent weakness – and it shows.

        And the stats prove that extra time off is of great value in the NFL, too. Although teams were only 16-16 coming out of their bye weeks last year, 2011 was really just an aberration. Since 1990, teams coming off of their bye have compiled a .542 winning percentage. Since the overall winning percentage is obviously an even .500, that’s a pretty substantial jump in 704 total games.

        And the Cowboys have been one of the league’s most successful teams following a bye. While the ’Boys have won 55.8 percent of their regular season games since 1990, they’ve notched a victory 69.6 percent of the time following their bye.

        Of course, the Cowboys don’t have a full two-week hiatus this time around, but it probably won’t matter. See, Dallas is also quite successful after Thanksgiving Day games, a period when they generally have nine days of rest prior to their next outing.

        In the entire history of the organization, the Cowboys have posted a .574 winning percentage. In the week following Thanksgiving, however, they’ve managed a .628 winning percentage, suggesting they’ve benefited from the added rest.

        In his short career as the Cowboys’ head coach, Garrett is just 1-2 when given nine or more days off between contests. Three games is hardly a substantial sample size, though, and the Cowboys actually played extremely well in their post-bye 20-16 loss to the New England Patriots last year.

        Stats aside, the Cowboys know what’s on the line against the Seahawks: A chance to start the season 2-0 for the first time since 2008. With that as their focus, you know the ’Boys will be prepared to play this Sunday in Seattle.

        BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE: Jerry Jones, Dallas Cowboys introducing ‘Jerry Wipes’, a multi-purpose novelty

        Jerry Jones and his CEC - Certified Eyeglass Cleaner - The Boys Are Back blog

        PHOTO: Jerry Wipes, inspired by a viral video of Cowboys’ owner Jerry Jones getting his glasses cleaned, will be sold in the Dallas Cowboys online store. Jerry Wipes aren’t the first instance of the polarizing NFL owner poking fun at himself – or making money.

        The Dallas Cowboys won their season opener against the New York Giants last week, but the breakout star of the game wasn’t anyone on the field. It was Jerry Jones’ glasses.

        Jones, the highly visible and polarizing Cowboys owner, stole the thunder from his team’s road victory over the Super Bowl champion Giants when video footage taken of Jones watching the game showed him casually handing off his glasses to be cleaned by an unidentified man sitting behind him in the owner’s box.

        The video went viral, and the questions (and jokes) flew. Who was the man cleaning Jerry’s glasses? Some sort of manservant from a bygone era of kings? Is the billionaire Jones really so rich that he can’t be bothered wipe a smudge off his own glasses?

        Not quite. The glasses-cleaner turned out to be Jones’s son in law, Shy Anderson, who offered an explanation of the spectacle (sorry) to Alan Peppard of the Dallas Morning News:

        "Jerry never talks to anybody during the game. He is so focused. But he started asking, ‘Where’s  [Cowboys tight end Jason] Witten?’ I was looking over his shoulder and I could see his glasses were completely smudged. I said, ‘Seriously, Jerry? Let me see your glasses.’ I actually had an eyeglass cloth in my pocket."

        So it was just family members watching out for each other, more than an extravagance of the uber-rich. But that isn’t stopping Anderson and Jones from cashing in on their brief Internet fame.

        One week after he was caught by NBC cameras wiping the eyeglasses of Jerry Jones during the NFL game, the son-in-law of the Dallas Cowboys owner said he’s hoping to capitalize on all the attention by selling a product inspired by the infamous moment.

        Jerry Jones said on his weekly radio show that Anderson has taken good-natured ribbing for wiping the glasses. Anderson, who is married to Jones’ daughter Charlotte, has run the Dallas Desperados, an Arena Football League team, as well as other business interests.

        Anderson has designed a line of eyeglass wipes printed with the words “Jerry Wipes” on them, to be sold in the Dallas Cowboys’ online store. No word yet on the price, or for how long the wipes will be sold. “It started out as a joke, but let’s see how far we can take it.” Anderson said.

        It’s all par for the course for Jones, who is no stranger to hamming it up, laughing at himself, or making money. During his 24-year tenure as owner and general manager, he has turned the Dallas Cowboys into the most valuable pro sports franchise in the NFL and the United States, worth $2 billion. He’s also starred in a series of ads for pizza chain Papa Johns, in which he both break dances and raps. So Jerry Wipes aren’t the first or last time Jerry Jones will cash in on an opportunity.

        EXCLUSIVE: The Great Robbini’s BOLD predictions for Week #1

         

        Regular readers already know that The Boys Are Back blog features the ALMOST WORLD FAMOUS predictions from The GREAT Robbini. His new crystal ball has been dragged out of the closet … dusted … and polished. The GREAT Robbini is psyched about the 2012 Dallas Cowboys vibe … and ready to share his prognostications that we all count on from week-to-week.

        Without further delay, it’s time for The GREAT Robbini’s predictions. I’m sure you’ll agree … a lot of these will come true. OK, here we go …

        The GREAT Robbini – Week #1 predictions:

        After an early New York Giants lead, Dallas Cowboys handle the champs – Make statement

        This years Dallas Cowboys defense makes the difference. Coming up clutch in the opener that couldn’t look less like last years fiasco in New York.

        • 4 sacks on Eli Manning (2 by DeMarcus Ware)
        • 3 takeaways by the Dallas Defense
        • Sean Lee leads tackles
        • At least 1 takeaway per half
        • New York Giants punt 6 times
        • New York Giants with 2 offensive injuries

        The Dallas offense, with some major work to do find a way to strike in face of New York’s menacing D front, produce:

        • 150 yards rushing
        • 2 Tony Romo TD’s, 300 yards passing
        • 1 Dez Bryant TD
        • 1 Cole Beasley TD
        • Dan Bailey perfect game
        • 90 yards penalties
        • 3 injured Dallas Cowboy players

        The GREAT Robbini

        NEW SPORTS SITCOM: NBC’s “GO ON” starring Matthew Perry

        GO ON Show on NBC with Matthew Perry - The Boys Are Back blog

        A sportscaster with anger issues must attend grief counseling to keep his job.

        Matthew Perry ("Friends," "Mr. Sunshine") stars as Ryan King, a recent widower and sports talk radio host ready to get back to work after the loss of his wife. Ryan’s boss, Stephen, played by John Cho ("Star Trek," "Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle"), has a different plan in store for Ryan, making him attend grief counseling before returning to the air. A reluctant Ryan finds himself in a support group for "life change," where he meets an oddball cast of characters, all with their own backstories filled with varying degrees of loss.

        On his very first visit, Ryan convinces the group to deviate from their normal session and starts a tournament-style competition (March Sadness!) to find out whose story is the worst. Ryan’s total lack of interest in "the healing process" proves distracting and he soon butts heads with the by-the-books group leader, Lauren, played by Tony Award-winner Laura Benanti ("The Playboy Club"). Back at work, Ryan is confronted with the fact that he hasn’t really processed his grief and realizes Lauren and the other members of the group might be key in helping him move on. Also starring are Tony Award-Winner Julie White ("Transformers") as Anne, Bill Cobbs ("The Muppets," "Night at the Museum") as George and Suzy Nakamura ("Dodgeball") as Yolanda.

        "Go On" is a touching new comedy created by Emmy Award-winning writer/executive producer Scott Silveri ("Perfect Couples," "Friends"). Todd Holland ("Malcolm in the Middle"), Karey Nixon ("Free Agents," "Miss/Guided") and Jon Pollack ("Up All Night," "30 Rock") also serve as executive producers. The pilot was directed by Holland.

        STARRING: Matthew Perry (Ryan King), Laura Benanti (Lauren), Julie White (Annie), Suzy Nakamura (Yolanda), Tyler James Williams (Owen), Brett Gelman (Mr. K), John Cho (Stephen)

        GO ON comedy on NBC with Matthew Perry - The Boys Are Back blog

        Press the PLAY button to watch the pilot – NEW EPISODE PREMIERE SEPT 11 TUESDAYS 9/8c

        LINK:  http://www.nbc.com/go-on/video/Pilot/1412723 GoON Show

        Press the PLAY button to watch Fan Chat with John Cho – Duration 2:45

        LINK: http://www.nbc.com/go-on/video/fan-chat-with-john-cho/1412541

        Jerry Jones discusses being in episode of new Dallas TV series

        Larry Hagman as J.R. Ewing - The Boys Are Back blog

        Cowboys owner Jerry Jones said Tuesday that he will be in an episode of the TNT drama series Dallas which begins Wednesday.

        "I did enjoy having it shot out at the stadium, having it shot there in the suite" said Jones, who wasn’t sure when the episode will air. "Of course, I’ve always been a big fan and was a big fan, when I first got to Dallas, of J.R., so all of that fit well. I think it’s a good thing for Dallas."

        The current show is considered a continuation of the original series, which aired at night on CBS from 1978 to 1991.

        The character J.R. Ewing, the one Jones was referring to, is a conniving oil baron and the protagonist of the series.

        Does Jones see some of himself in Ewing?

        "I think that’s a loaded question," a laughing Jones responded. "We both have a cowboy hat on, I know that."

        Larry Hagman, who plays Ewing, attended the Cowboys game against the Buffalo Bills at Cowboys Stadium last season. During that November game, Ewing and other cast members were in Jones’ suite.

        "From time-to-time over the years, these kind of appearances like that, I really don’t call that being on a show," Jones said. "I just like to get around the set."

        SOMEWHAT RELATED: Jerry Jones inspires Dallas quotes quiz

        He said what?

        Jerry Jones said Tony Romo’s performance Sunday … was "outstanding?" "One of the best games I’ve ever seen him play"?

        Oh, but that’s just Jerry being Jerry — one of Dallas’ more outspoken characters since the area became the Metroplex.

        But he isn’t the only one. Over in TV land, Jones’ fellow oil man J.R. Ewing of "Dallas" hardly held his tongue, and his reckless ways eventually got him (and, later, Mr. Burns from "The Simpsons") shot.

        So, all that considered, it’s time for a quiz. Can you pick which of the two said the following?

        1. "I don’t lay up. I hit across the water to get to the green. And that’s risk-taking. And so, when it misses it can miss looking bad."

        a) Jerry Jones

        b) J.R. Ewing

        2. "Anything worth having is worth going for, all the way."

        a) Jerry Jones

        b) J.R. Ewing

        3. "You’re overmatched. I hope you’ve got your game face on."

        a) Jerry Jones

        b) J.R. Ewing

        4. "We’re down to circumcising mosquitoes."

        a) Jerry Jones

        b) J.R. Ewing

        5. "If [name redacted] put two and two together, he’d get three."

        a) Jerry Jones

        b) J.R. Ewing

        6. "All that matters is winning."

        a) Jerry Jones

        b) J.R. Ewing

        7. "The day I start living by the rules my wife set for me will be the one when the Dallas Cowboys make it to the Super Bowl."

        a) Jerry Jones

        b) J.R. Ewing

        Jerry Jones is always the go-to guy for newsworthy Cowboys quotes, and he usually delivers - The Boys Are Back blog

        Answer key: 1, a; 2, b; 3, a (but from the movie "Dallas: War of the Ewings"!; 4, a; 5, b; 6, b; 7, b.

        Interesting article: Larry Hagman returns as J.R. in ‘Dallas’ TV series

        Interesting video: Bobby meets Jerry Jones owner of the Dallas Cowboys

        .

        Bobby meets Jerry Jones owner of the Dallas Cowboys. From the movie War of The Ewings

        EXCLUSIVE: The Great Robbini’s BOLD predictions for Week #16

        Here are the ALMOST WORLD FAMOUS predictions from Robert A Knight … aka The GREAT Robbini … our self-proclaimed prediction guru. He’s back this week … fired up … and Jerry Jones’n for some NFC East showdown action!

        Just weeks ago, it appeared the New York Giants had the NFC East under control. At that time, Dallas fans were eyeing one of the available two wild card spots. It’s quite different today. This weekend, the Dallas Cowboys can take control … and let the Giants fight for a wildcard entry into the playoffs. But first, as we all know, they have to take out the Philadelphia Eagles at Cowboys Stadium. That’s going to be quite a challenge, if we consider the results the last time these two rivals met in Philly.

        The thing that’s on all of our minds is … WHICH NFC East team will host that wildcard weekend playoff game? As of this moment, The “Boys, Giants, and Eagles have a shot at it! . Two divisional games today will help decide their fates.

        It’s time for The GREAT Robbini’s predictions … I’m sure you’ll agree … a lot of these will come true. OK, here we go …

        Eagles come into Dallas on a surprise playoff mission. Rob Ryan and the ‘Boys out for redemption. Who gets their Christmas wish?

        • Tony Romo 3 TDs (Romo injured, McGee 1 TD)
        • Miles Austin TD (4 for 40 yds, including the TD)
        • Diamond Dez Bryant TD (6 for 62 yds)
        • Tony Romo INT (McGee 0 INT)
        • ‘Boys 100yds rushing (81)
        • Diamond Dez breaks 800 yds. for season (needs 4 yards!)
        • ‘Boys receive 3rd QTR kick
        • Michael Vick 270 yds. passing (296)
        • Eagles 2 giveaways (1)
        • McCoy TD (13 for 35, plus 10 yds receiving)
        • Vick sacked 3x (2 DeMarcus Ware, multiple pressures)
        • Eagles trail at half (never trailed)
        • Eagles 3 plays over 30yds (close enough, 2 over 30, 2 nearly there!)
        • PHI loses by less than 6
        • BONUS prediction: NYG lose to NYJ

        Remember, you read it here! The Great Robbini predictions for week #16


        TBAB POSTGAME SUMMARY: Dallas D had a rough first half, but improved as the game progressed. With Romo out, the Dallas offense was unable to get any momentum. McGee struggled, due to PHI pressure and from being rusty. Backup QB’s get very little time with starting units during the week. Luckily, McGee’s final drive produced a TD, which helped Dallas avoid a home shutout for the first time in 165 games. Philadelphia put enough pressure on McGee to prevent many big plays down the field. It was nice to see him rolling out, avoiding sacks, and making plays when the pressure was closing in. As the week progresses, we’ll hear more about Tony Romo’s hand injury and if he’ll be the starter. As you probably know, the Giants won earlier. The Dallas Cowboys playoff hopes boil down to the final game of the season … in New York … primetime. Get set for one of the highest rated Sunday Night Football games in history!

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        THE BOYS ARE BACK RETRO MOMENT: Budweiser Commercials

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        EXCLUSIVE: The Great Robbini’s BOLD predictions for Week #14

        The Boys Are Back blog exclusive … The GREAT Robbini, prediction guru

        Here are the ALMOST WORLD FAMOUS predictions from Robert A Knight … aka The GREAT Robbini … our self-proclaimed prediction guru. He’s back this week … fired up … and Jerry Jones’n for some NFC East showdown action!

        Just weeks ago, it appeared the New York Giants had the NFC East under control. At that time, Dallas fans were eyeing one of the available two wild card spots. It’s quite different today. This weekend, the Dallas Cowboys can take control … and let the Giants fight for a wildcard entry into the playoffs.

        The thing that’s on all of our minds is … WHICH Dallas Cowboys team will we see? Is it the one that was manhandled by the Philadelphia Eagles? The team that played the Jets and Patriots to the wire? Or the team that did what they had to do vs. the likes of the Redskins, lowly St. Louis Rams.

        This week, the Dallas Cowboys welcome back two key members of the 53-man roster … Miles Austin and Tony Fiammetta. Both appear ready to play … mentally. The recent Arizona loss surely left a bitter taste. Let’s hope we see a rebound … and a playoff worthy performance Sunday night.

        It’s time for The GREAT Robbini’s predictions … I’m sure you’ll agree … a lot of these will come true. OK, here we go …

        The Cowboys turn it on. Winning at home convincingly over the Giants. Breaking the Sunday Night losing streak, adding to the home field winning streak and taking a two game advantage over New York as division king. The Dallas Cowboys return game, rushing edge and big play catches will fuel the win. NYG come away looking limited. Defensively strong but undermanned to handle the ‘Boys.

         

        • Tony Romo 285 yds.+
        • DeMarco Murray 90 yds.+
        • Diamond Dez Bryant TD
        • Dez Bryant with 70 yd. game
        • Jason Witten 5 catches
        • Laurent Robinson 70+ yds.
        • DeMarco Murray TD
        • DeMarcus Ware 2 sacks
        • Dallas has 4 team sacks
        • Dallas creates at least 2 turnovers
        • NYG under 80 yds. rushing
        • Eli Manning 1 interception
        • NYG scoreless in one quarter
        • New York Giants receive 2nd half kick
        • Dallas Cowboys win
        • BONUS PREDICTION – Philadelphia and Washington lose

        Remember, you read it here! The Great Robbini predictions for week #14


        TBAB POSTGAME SUMMARY: Check back after the game for the summary.

        EXCLUSIVE: The Great Robbini’s BOLD predictions for Week #11

        The Boys Are Back exclusive ... The GREAT Robbini
        The Boys Are Back exclusive … The GREAT Robbini

        Here are the NEARLY WORLD FAMOUS predictions from Robert A Knight … aka The GREAT Robbini … our self-proclaimed prediction guru. He’s back this week … fired up … and Felix Jones’n for some NFC East rematch action! This time, he’s made nearly two dozen predictions … some of them bold … as always, he’s confident and cocky about the outcome of this weeks game! 

        Eight weeks ago, the Washington Redskins came into Cowboys Stadium and left with a two-point loss. After that game, Dallas went into slump and a period ‘finding themselves’.  Along the way … the “Boys found a rising superstar running back, improving offensive line, sparks in the receiving corp, and a reliable rookie kicker. This week, a surging Cowboys team travels into hostile Washington, on the heels of  the Redskins five-game losing streak.  A healthy Tony Romo is coming off his best game of the year and the vibe is definitely on the side of America’s Team. Will the Redskins find motivation and pull themselves out of their slump against the NFL’s #8 offense and #5 defense? We’ll soon find out. Kickoff at 12:00 noon, Dallas time. 

        It’s time for The GREAT Robbini’s predictions … I’m sure you’ll agree … a lot of these will come true. OK, here we go …

        The GREAT Robbini – Week #11 predictions: 

        It’s going to be a bumpy ride. The Redskins will not overcome the odds Sunday against the surging Cowboys. Even plagued by injury and illness, the ‘boys fly in and show em who’s boss. It’s a Redskins sweep this year. Add another notch.

        • Tony Romo 3 TDs
        • Tony Romo throws for over 245
        • TD Diamond Dez Bryant
        • Dez gets over 50 yards
        • TD Jason Witten
        • Jason Witten has 4+ catches
        • Robinson over 45 yds
        • Cowboys over 100 yds rushing
        • Murray/Jones account for at least 140 yds 
        • Boys control the clock
        • Boys lead in 1st downs
        • Cowboys capitalize on five + 3rd downs
        • Skins receive kick to start 3rd quarter
        • Boys force 2 turnovers
        • Cowboys defense makes at least 1 INT
        • Boys make at least 3 team sacks
        • Ware 2 sacks
        • Lee leads tackles
        • Skins punt at least 5x
        • Skins injury during game (starter)
        • Game ends in regulation
        • Cowboys win
        • Cowboys remain in 2nd place. (Giants also win)

        Remember, you read it here! The Great Robbini predictions for week #11

        TBAB POSTGAME SUMMARY: All in all … a pretty strong showing by The GREAT Robbini this week. Eleven of his bold predictions came true … three didn’t. What Robinson lacked in total yardage, he made up for on the TD catch. Robinson was targeted many times today, but he was unable to connect with Tony Romo. They seemed out of sync for the first time this year. The running game did well, but not quite up to that 100 yard threshold we all hold so dear. The Dallas defense allowed the Redskins to stay in the game. Garrett stayed with the running game plan, but the opportunities were limited by our blockers and offensive line. Both, DeMarco Murray and Felix Jones, averaged under 3 yards per carry … on a combined 30 carries. The Redskins did a good job of limiting both running backs today. Staying with the running attack (and play action), Dallas completed several nice passes to the receivers, tight-ends, and tailbacks. The tight-ends caught seven passes, and the wide receivers had nine. The running back duo caught seven passes, which added to their overall stats.  The jury’s still out on the Giants win and Dallas retaining 2nd place. Check back later for that summary. Overall, nice job Robbini!

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        EXCLUSIVE: The Great Robbini’s BOLD predictions for Week #10

        The GREAT Robbini - The Boys Are Back

        The GREAT Robbini - The Boys Are Back

        Here are the BOLD predictions from Robert A Knight … aka The GREAT Robbini … our self-proclaimed prediction guru. He’s back this week … fired up … and Jerry Jones’n for some Buffalo vs Dallas Super Bowl rematch action! As we’ve come to expect … this week … he’s more confident than ever!

        Tomorrow afternoon, the ‘Boys are back at home, hosting the revived Buffalo Bills. As you know, if you’re a regular The Boys Are Back reader, Jerry Jones tore down Dallas native Fred Jackson’s house to build his $1.3 billion dollar house! Fred Jackson is coming home with the intention of making a statement … for his proud Dallas area family and friends! For more info, click HERE and HERE.

        Dallas is coming off a win vs the lowly Seahags. The Bills are coming into Big D with a few Super Bowl buffalo chips on their shoulders. With all of that being said, look for a tough game … one that we counted as a “freebie” back a few months ago!

        It’s time for The GREAT Robbini’s predictions … I’m sure you’ll agree … most of these are very BOLD. OK, here we go …

        The GREAT Robbini – Week #10 predictions: 

        The ‘Boys host the Buffalo Bills tomorrow in Arlington. Is this a crucial game? Yes. BUF has beaten serious contenders this year. They run with ferocity. They create meaningful turnovers. They don’t quit. Dallas on the other hand has ALMOST beaten serious contenders. It’s only recently that Dallas has been running with ferocity. This year, we have seen the ‘Boys infamously give up costly turnovers and they have been seen giving up their fight … late in the game. All this combined with the divisional battles taking place in the NFC East will provide for a January thriller in the house Jerry built.

        Will the Cowboys come to play this Sunday? Yes. Will BUF show intensity? Yes. Will DeMarcus Ware wage war against Chan Gaily? Oh yes. Will the Cowboys claim victory over Fred Jackson, spoiling his homecoming? Yeah, probably just over the spot where he lost his matchbox cars.

        The GREAT Robbini

        • Tony Romo 2 TD’s
        • DeMarco Murray TD
        • Jason Witten 4+ catches
        • Diamond Dez Bryant TD
        • Laurent Robinson 50+ yards
        • Over 70 yards rushing for cowboys
        • Romo tops 235 passing
        • Cowboys score 1st drive
        • Cowboys receive kick to open 2nd half
        • DeMarco Murray averages over 4.0 yards per carry ß bold
        • Cowboys control the clock
        • Cowboys 1 giveaway
        • Cowboys give up 2 sacks
        • Cowboys force 2 turnovers
        • Ware 2 sacks
        • Cowboys at least 3 team sacks
        • Bills will rush for over 70 yds against the Dallas defense
        • Bills over 220 passing
        • Bills have injured starter during game
        • Game ends in regulation
        • Cowboys win

        Remember, you read it here! The Great Robbini predictions for week #10

        TBAB POSTGAME SUMMARY: Check back here after the game for the summary.

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